today

so today i asked my best friend here, Alec, who i don't think i have mentioned, to help me and my situation. and i have to say, he is crazy. he gave me two options, asking butt guy to coffee or just straight up asking him if he wants to fuck, because Alec knows i just want to fuck him once. and option one, im too much of a pussy to do that. like seriously, im not like that with anyone except a person i like. and option two, if i can't do option one how the hell am i gonna do option two. i really want to ask him to coffee when we are both studying and need a break, but i don't know if i have enough balls to do that.
then, in chemistry when i told Rebecca about what Alec said she just laughed and asked me if i was gonna do any of them. i told her im too much of a pussy. and Craig and this other kid Kevin were also there and Craig called me a guy, which i know i am because i just want to fuck this guy once and how much i curse and many other things i do.
so life is just not floating my boat right now, because i also have finals to deal with.


☮ hope ♥